“This is one of the miracles of love: It gives a power of seeing through its own enchantments and yet not being disenchanted.”  ~ C. S. Lewis

I was listening to the sermon Sunday when it struck me:  “I’m so lousy at relationships that I’d be better as a hermit living alone. Or maybe I should get walled into an ante-room of a Cathedral as an anchorite.  Nah, they don’t do that anymore.”

The point is, I could see myself being very happy alone with a pile of illuminated manuscript to prepare, or a list of people from the nearby village for whom to pray. And I really am crummy at being good, day in and day out, to one person.  Poor Steve!  How he hasn’t divorced me, I just don’t know.  Then yesterday, Lillian Daniel mentioned C S Lewis, and his belief that love is a decision.  I have Erich Fromm’s quote posted at my desk.  So I searched, and found the Lewis quote above.  Lewis uses choice; Fromm uses decision:

“Love is a decision, it is a judgment, it is a promise.  If love were only a feeling there would be no basis for the promise to love each other forever.  A feeling comes and it may go.”

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I keep hoping, praying even, that I can grow a loving mindset toward poor Steve. See, I’ve been married before and I find it easy to fall out of love.  It’s as easy for me as falling into love.  And Steve is a great guy.  And I’m an ingrate, and a typically cranky one at that!  

Will you pray with me, please?

It’s me again, God, with the same request I bring to you so often.

Almighty Architect,

I bring my requests to you because only you are the power to make things happen. I can’t do this by myself. And my memory is not good. I don’t remember my resolutions from one day to the next. But I know that I can do all things in you, because you can do all things. You are amazing!

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Majestic Maker,

Make me love.  Make me remember to choose to love.  It seems so easy in the abstract, but I am so easily annoyed! Be the string around my finger and remind me, every time I start to be nasty. Make the good shine through Steve’s actions; show me his honorable intent. Humble me, God. I have no more words for this request, but that it be on my lips all day long.

Generous Giver,

Thank you for new fallen snow, beautiful and shiny. Thank you for the heat and energy of the sun that melts the snow on the walk ways and drive ways. Thank you for enough money to buy Christmas presents, even a little extravagantly this year. Thank you for love. Thank you for reminding me to choose to be loving. Lord, I love you so much!

In Jesus’ name,

Amen.

To God be the glory!

© Melissa Pazen, 2013

Live Inspired: pray continually; think boldly; dare greatly; love unconditionally; act deliberately, kindly, justly, mercifully and humbly; forgive easily; laugh frequently!

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